Holding the Net: Caring for My Mother on the Tightrope of Aging by Melanie P. Merriman
By now we have read all sorts of books about aging in place, end of life care, and so forth. Holding the Net: Caring for My Mother on the Tightrope of Aging by Melanie P. Merriman actually provides a backspin on all of those.
I, David, have been in two nursing homes since 2012. Suzanne and I realize that no matter how hard these people try, a nursing home is as close to prison as most of us will ever get. One day I said to our friend Jerry that I had been in a nursing home, had never been to prison, but imagined that the nursing home was as close to prison as most of us will ever get. Jerry said he had been in both and the nursing home is worse.
This book is an enthralling story of one family’s struggle with their mother’s end of life and how they dealt with it. But there is a backspin. The backspin is that the author had been a hospice professional for years and knew most of the ins and outs of how the system works, or doesn’t.
This family wasn’t hurting financially, but still had to deal with at least some of the heartache many families have to deal with when putting their loved ones in rehab. Merriman was able to see first-hand how Medicaid patients are treated far differently than others, even though the nursing facility does its best to provide top quality services for all.
We feel that all rooms in all medical facilities should be private, not semi-private. How good are our privacy walls when we share a room with another person and their visitors?
This is a book you will want to read without stopping. You won’t want to put it down. The author shows us how scared her mother is in all of this. The author was scared and lost; her sister was, too. How could they help their mother?
We give Holding the Net all five stars. It is very well-written and very informative. It is written in a very readable style. If you or someone you love will be facing end of life issues any time soon, you will want to read this book.
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