31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 21

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Sunday, 21 October 2018

Start

Where do I start? I was once told that if I couldn’t think of anything to write, to write about not being able to write. So, I’ll go with that thought and write about not being able to start.

I am lacking motivation, oomph, whatever you want to call it these days. I am feeling very overwhelmed. More and more I’m expected to do or deal with less and less to do the doing or dealing with. So, I’m left looking at this or that, wondering where to start and, in some cases, not being able to make myself start.

No matter what I do, there is more to do. Before I’m done with project number one, projects two through ten are before me. So, I don’t start. When there is an overwhelming amount of things to do, nothing gets done. I can’t make myself start on any of them.

What about you? How do you make yourself start when you are overwhelmed?

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 20

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Saturday, 20 October 2018

Audience

I do not like having an audience, at least, not an in-person audience. I am find with interacting with folks online. I just am totally terrified at the thought of public speaking.  One-on-one, I’m okay (most of the time). Two-on-one, okay. Any more than that and the stress levels start to climb.

The thought of being on stage, performing in any way for an audience, makes my tongue swell, my legs shake and go weak, sometimes buckling under me. I have trouble talking, can’t remember what I need to say, and other embarrassing things.

I am not meant to have an audience, not in the typical sense of the word. I am meant for behind-the-scenes things, the support person for the one on stage, playing to the audience. Or, to be part of the audience myself.  However, even being in the audience makes me uncomfortable in real life events.

Do you like having an audience? Are you all out there, in performer mode, wanting all eyes on you?  Do you think folks that don’t like that level of attention of somehow weird?

Please answer in the comments. I’d love to read your response.

Have a blessed day!

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 19

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Friday, 19 October 2018

Who

When I first read this prompt, one of the first things to pop into my head was, “Who do you say that I am?” Jesus said it to Simon Peter in Matthew 16.

I say that He is the Christ, the Son of the Living God, my Lord and Savior. He is my Redeemer. He died so that I might live. He is my Protector and Comforter.

He is the “Who” that I want to please, want to live for, want to share with the world.

When this life is over, He is the “Who” that will come for me. I look forward to that day.

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 16

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Tuesday, 16 October 2018

Pray

We are called to pray without ceasing. There have been moments in my life when I have, quite literally, prayed without ceasing. My every breath was a prayer. I was claiming freedom from fear, three days non-stop, until the tears stopped and the fear was gone. I could go on with my life.

Praying is a great way to build and maintain a relationship with Heavenly Father. We can talk to Him like a friend or Father. We can be real with Him. He already knows anyway, so why be fake? He is always there to listen.

We take our cares and worries to Him. Ideally, we turn them over to Him and don’t pick them back up. But, inevitably we do, and so we continue to come to our Friend in prayer, knowing that He has it all covered.

When nothing else seems to be making a difference, prayer can.

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 15

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Monday, 15 October 2018

When

When you get the call, and you’re over a thousand miles away, and there’s no way to go, what do you do?  You sit down and cry. And pray. Lots of praying. Praying for healing, an earthside healing, if it is His will. And, if it isn’t, for an easy passing, no suffering. For her to know that you love her and miss her and are sorry you can’t be there.  You couldn’t be there for Daddy either.

When your misinformed choices take you away from those that you love and keep you from being there in their last moments, all the moments, the guilt and sadness are unbearable.

When you just can’t take it anymore and the whys hound you and the what ifs try to drive you crazy, when you’re just before finding a bridge, that is when He sends His angels to rescue you.

Though you made the choices, He allowed them to happen for a reason, a reason that you may never understand.

When you believe in Him, everything works out in the end.  The victory has already been won. When your time comes, you will see them again. The parting is just for a time. Family is forever.

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 14

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Sunday, 14 October 2018

Ask

“Ask”…that is something that I’ve been doing my entire life, asking questions.  I drive folks crazy with the questions. I refuse to take things just as they are told to me. I ask a thousand questions to more fully understand and make sense of whatever it is. Sometimes I ask questions, not for my own benefit, but to cause the other person to think. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.

Asking questions is one of the best ways to learn. In my opinion, you don’t learn if you just go along with the flow and accept everything as it is presented to you. Go at it with the whole who, what, when, where, why, and how routine.  My favorite one to ask is, “Why?”

Encourage the art of asking in your children. Don’t stifle their curiosity. Answer their questions! Encourage that thirst for knowledge and hunger for learning.

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 13

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Saturday, 13 October 2018

Talk

I can’t seem to talk for long anymore without crying. This evening has held a lot of tears. Earlier, my little sister gave me the news that our mama’s next oldest sister is now in hospice care and not expected to make it through the night.

I have a lot on my heart that I cannot put into words. I want to talk about it but I don’t want to talk about it. Whatever would come out of me wouldn’t make sense to anyone else…it doesn’t really even make sense to me most of the time.

I want to run away.  I want to go home.

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 12

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Friday, 12 October 2018

Praise

I will praise you, from the depths of my despair and the heights of my joy, I will praise you. In tears and in laughter, I will praise you. In sickness and in health, I will praise you.

As the sun shines down and the moon lights up the night, I will praise you. As the bluebonnets and paintbrushes bloom, and the land around heats up, I will praise you. As the leaves fall, and the wind blows, I will praise her. Scorching drought and devastating floods all around and I will praise you. Beautiful days and lightning bug nights, I will praise you.

You are my everything, my Creator, my Father, my Savior, my Redeemer. I will praise you.

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 11

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Thursday, 11 October 2018

Door

All I have to do is open that door. That’s all. Not anything difficult…or is it?

On the other side of that door is freedom, but also the source of my fears. Maybe if I open that door, those fears will ultimately consume me. But, maybe, if I open that door, I will be free, free to live the life that I have always dreamed of living.

Staying on this side of the door guarantees one thing: I will never be free. Fear can win whether I open the door or not. It can keep me locked inside this house or it can be there when I open the door. It can consume me, if I let it.

The only chance there is at freedom is to walk through that door.

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes – Day 10

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31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes

Please join everyone at Five Minute Friday for 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes throughout the month of October.

Wednesday, 10 October 2018

How

How do I get past this? Every time they bark, my heart races, even when I’m inside the house. The attack was just over a month ago and I still cringe when I go outside. I take the bat with me to the mailbox, knowing if they attack me again, I may not be able to use it.

How long are the bad dreams going to keep happening?

I know this is an attack of the devil, using those dogs to shatter my security and safety. Heavenly Father has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and a sound mind.

Mine doesn’t feel too sound at the moment. This attack was the last straw, or at least feels like it.

How do I get past this?

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